Thoughts On Losing a Pet

"Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened" - Dr. Seuss

Originally published on March 21, 2016

Recently I lost one of my cats. Mocha wasn't particularly young, but it was still a shock when I got a text from my mom saying he wasn't moving from his favorite spot and refusing to eat. He had gotten sick like this once before, about two years ago while I was still in high school. I did online research and managed to use a syringe to get water in him. A few days later he was fine. I was so sure that it was the same little stomach bug he had before, so I told my mom exactly what I had done. She said he wouldn't even accept water in a syringe, just turn his head away. I was coming home that weekend, so I told her to keep trying and I would be able to help him. Friday morning, she called me and told me he didn't make it through the night.

I think I still haven't fully processed it, as I am writing this two days later. It was strange to not be there at all for him. I just kept trying to keep my mind off it during classes. When I went home the next day, my other cat Jack was there, all bouncy and loud. Jack seemed to be his usual self, so I figured if he could move on, so could I. I guess only time will tell how lonely Jack will be without Mo. As for me, I have found losing every pet is a different experience. When our first cat Buddy died, he was old and he was sick; it was obvious he was dying. I was young and devastated, never really having had an experience with death before. I was sad when other cats died, in varying degrees. None hit me like Buddy - until Mocha.

As our pet graveyard has slowly grown, I have come to realize pets, just like people, have had different impacts and "reasons" of sorts for being in our lives. Perhaps they were here to help us, or we were here to help them. I think Mocha and I were both there for each other. He seemed to understand me more than any other cat we had, and I was definitely his favorite. Pets are a part of a family. They have so much more impact on us because we know them for less time than the people in our lives. That is why we need to make the most of what time we have with them. I am sure all pet owners understand this. That time is worth whatever pain comes when it is over. This is why I chose the quote I did above. Of course it is completely fine and natural to be sad when losing a pet, but it is important to remember all the good memories that you both shared. It is even worse not being there to say goodbye. Thankfully, I have enough webcam footage from middle school to reminisce about Mocha with if the mood ever strikes and Jack just isn't making me feel better.

For the first time in my entire life, we only have one cat. It is so strange. However, just like Buddy, Cleo, Angel, Kitty, and all the rest, Mocha will remain in our memories as the fattest cat we have ever had, but also the cuddliest.

Rest in peace, Mo-kitty.